YOU ARE ENOUGH!
If you
ever want to experience the true wonder and magnificence
of the human voice, listen to Barbara Cook.
The 81-year-old,
legendary Broadway singer was here in Santa Monica last
week for a gala opening of a new performing arts center
and to teach a master voice class.
In her voice
classes she focuses on all the usual fundamentals. But as
she says, the most important concept she teaches
her students is "You are enough."
Her
message is:
You
are unique. You are original. You don't have to pretend
to be somebody else. You don't have to try to be the
way people think you ought to be. You need to show us who
you are. You need to show us those vulnerabilities. That's
what will resonate on stage and connect you with your audience.
That's
what will resonate in life. Barbara's wise words say
everything about how we need to be in order to have a loving,
joyful, fulfilling relationship with others and ourselves.
If you
really accept that you are enough, wouldn't you be
willing to just go for it with love and relationships? If
you accept that you are enough, wouldn't you be real
and vulnerable with your date or your partner?
If you knew that
you are enough, that you are unique and original, wouldn't
you be willing to be vulnerable and show us those things
about you? I believe you would. It's what makes this
life worth living.
Your
friends enjoy your uniqueness and they get to see that,
most of the time, because you are vulnerable and willing
to show it to them. They know how unique you are. They know
how original you are.
Why
You Believe You Aren't Enough
Somehow you
get in your head that you aren't enough; that in order
to be liked you have to behave in a certain way, you have
to suppress your originality, you have to hide.
Don Miguel Ruiz,
in "The Four Agreements," says that is a result
of being domesticated as a child. You start off as a loving,
open, free spirit and in order to keep getting the love
of your mother and father, you have to behave in ways that
keeps their love coming to you. Most parents don't
mean to do that, some do though, but they make love conditional.
If you're a good boy or girl, then we'll love
you.
So you
go through life thinking you need to act a certain way in
order to be liked and loved. You develop a core belief that
you aren't good enough. And then from that
place you forget how unique and original you are. And you
become unwilling to be vulnerable. Not a chance you're
going to risk that.
How
Do You Learn to Know You Are Enough?
The
journey from feeling not enough to I am enough starts with
accepting the possibility that you are enough. You came in as enough. You will always be enough. All souls
are precious. All souls are magnificent. So you start with
that fact.
It's the
circumstances that happened to you and what you created
along the way that led you to believe you aren't enough.
So you
start with the idea, "Well maybe I am enough."
Okay, I'll see how that feels for five minutes or
an hour. Try it right now. Just take a moment and
close your eyes and let yourself feel "I am enough."
Be with it for a moment.
Everyone will
have a different reaction to it. Some will cry, others will
laugh, feel relief, feel light, and others will be filled
with joy.
At first,
it might be fleeting, because the ego will come back in
quickly to remind you that you aren't enough and give
you specific reasons why. Don't listen to it.
It's
time to do battle with your ego! You know, that critical
voice that likes to remind you, 100 times a day, that you
aren't enough. Tell it to shut up. Leave you alone.
Because what is true is you are and always have been enough.
After
you've sat with the idea of being enough for an hour,
do it for a day. Don't let any of the circumstances
of life take it away from you. It's not about how
others see you or react to you. They can't give it
to you and they can't take it away from you.
Then
practice it for a week. You need to keep practicing it,
because you aren't used to this new way of holding,
seeing and being. It's the truth, but the
ego will want to remind you that this is silly, that you
aren't enough, etc. Again, tell it to shut up. This
isn't the time to be nice to your ego. It's
keeping you in what it thinks is a safe place, but is actually
a dead place. A false place.
Then
after practicing, for a day and week, that you ARE enough,
the next step is to be vulnerable with someone you usually
don't allow yourself to be vulnerable with. I mean take a risk!!! Again start small.
Suppose there
is someone you see who never smiles, smile at them. They
might not smile back right away, remember they are guarded
and think they are protecting themselves. But if you keep
it up, you might get a smile back. Don't do it for
that reason, just do it because you are unique and original
and they will appreciate that, at some level. Even if they
can't show you.
The
Benefits Of Realizing You Are Enough
You
aren't doing this exercise for others. You are doing
it for the freedom from the tyranny of your ego. You
are doing it for the opportunity to feel the absolute uniqueness
of your spirit and to feel the joy that comes from living
in this place of "I'm Enough!"
Keep
taking risks. You will begin to notice that you're
not alone - there are others who don't think
they are enough. In fact, the majority of people feel they
aren't enough.
As you see yourself
as enough, they will pick up that energy and want to be
around you. Then you can introduce the concept to them.
By gently encouraging them and not being judgmental, they
will begin to give themselves permission to practice being
enough. To let their unique self emerge.
Remember
being enough, giving yourself permission to be your unique,
original self, is a choice. It's a choice. Did I mention
it's a choice? It really is just a choice. Try it.
Freedom,
peace, joy, love and living full out come from knowing I
Am Enough.
Imagine the possibilities...
"THE FOUR AGREEMENTS COMPANION BOOK, by Don Miguel
Ruiz, takes you even further along the journey (than his
original book "The Four Agreements") to recover
the awareness and wisdom of your authentic self."
In this book
you will find:
"How to
break the domestication that keeps you enslaved by fear"
"Keys
to recover your will, your faith, and the power of your
word"
"Practice
ideas to help you become the master of your own life"
"A dialogue
with don Miguel about living the Four Agreements"
"Success
stories from people who have used the Four Agreements"
Put an end to
your suffering and read this valuable book. If you haven't
read "The Four Agreements" then order both that
and the companion book. You can get them on Amazon.
Get ready to
free yourself from taking things personally, making assumptions
and wasting time and energy trying to be perfect.
AN IMPORTANT
EVENT:
"Are
You Ready to Create Your Personal HEAVEN ON EARTH?"
Don Miguel is
doing this workshop in San Diego on October 11th at the
San Diego Convention Center. You can go to Louise Hays website
to get more information. Her site is: http://www.hayhouse.com
